THE END OF A SPECIAL MONTH.

Today is the 29th, it is the leap day. I think, it is a recognition of science - the accuracy to which scientists have determined the revolution of the earth around the sun. The usage of the leap year once every four years, has ensured at least that there is no clear shift of the seasons in the past few decades. Remarkable, isn't it?
Well, just a thought.

Today was also GP CT. It hardly felt like a common test; most of us were hardly in the mood for it. And GP is a subject where one really needs to 'get in the groove' of it to do well. But oh well, at least there was a question I had content for, so I did not have to generate on-the-spot and face all the nervousness about time resulting from that. Compre. was as usual. Paraphrase 'seriousness'? Goodness, the setters must have worked hard on it; they would be delighted when they start marking, I suppose.

Oh well, so much for the common test. It's 1/5 done. 17 days from now, the rest.
Anyway, at the start of the month, I think I was asked quite a pertinent question. What are areas which could potentially make me drift further away from God. And two things popped up obviously. Studies...and soccer. The fact that soccer makes it in there side by side with studies says it all. And then I thought again, yes, am I really very academically-oriented? And if people were to ask me such a question, I would probably say, no. And that is the truth. Yes, if I do badly for a test, right after that, or maybe even for the entire day itself, I would feel down. I would not be as willing to chat with others. But at least, this is so much better than in the past where I would be so keen to discuss answers and count marks. So, yes, maybe, but probably not - to whether studies would hinder my walk with God.

What about soccer? Well, there are two issues to it - the time spent, and the how much emotion it drains out of me. Time spent? My resolution was to keep to 2 matches a week - which I know is still a lot. So if Arsenal play twice in a week I'll watch both matches, if not its Arsenal's match plus a big match if there is one, e.g. Liverpool v Chelsea or League Cup Final. In addition, I play fantasy football. So each week involves looking up the fixture list for that week and subsequent weeks, searching for the right players, and picking the right captain. Players who are on form, players who are rising in value, and dumping players who's value I predict would fall. I do it for BPL and champions league. For the BPL game I've slumped big time cause I made the biggest mistake one could make - not have Ronaldo in your team and not add him when his cost was still relatively low. For the champions league I (proudly say that I'm) in the top 1000 out of over 50,000 players, thanks to having Fabregas, van NIstelrooy, Messi and Kanoute in my team. Well anyway, I hope this would serve me well for investing in the real world in the future. It's a lot more complex, but at least this game is one that really gets me excited too. For now, that's the time spent on it.
Emotions? I have to say, the worse feeling one can have, is to drop points in a match that your team really, really deserved to win. It is very frustrating, and yes, it is very emotionally draining, it is a problem for me. Things have improved a lot this season, but to be honest, I think most of it is down to Arsenal's improvement in form, not mine. And that's the truth. 1-2 down against Man United last year, I was whining and whining about how the match should have been sealed in our favour. Of course when Gallas got the equaliser it changed to jubilation. I watched the first team got owned 5-1 by Spurs and 4-0 by Man United recently, and the feeling is just...the 'can't be helped feeling'. I think I am quite fine with that, accepting defeat when it is deserved. The big problem is still embracing defeat when so many chances have been created and spurned. Like against Birmingham. That is a problem, and I don't know, it may be that the passion I have towards soccer will mean that I will forever boil over when it happens. Thus, herein lies the issue of drifting away from God. It's all good when Arsenal are winning and the youngsters are making the critics eat humble pie (love this phrase) , but when it goes bad it is an emotional drain on me. And it would mean I cannot focus well on anything else - studies, reading, or QT. The way to solve it, I suppose, is to gradually channel this passion onto serving God and growing his Kingdom. I've always had this desire to grow in God, the moment I converted, but I have been held back for a long time by inertia, and lack of desire to change. And without the desire, things would not change. Thus I would have to make another big change now. Can I foresee a day when I miss an Arsenal match and not be desperate to know the result right away? Well, I'm going to have to face it during NS. But yeah, apart from that, it will be difficult. I've really developed a bond for this wonderful team, and, like Thierry Henry said, they will forever occupy a space in my heart. The point now, just like to advance a relationship, is to stick with them through thick and thin, which is to accept the inherent occasional slip-ups that come with playing football the way they play. Chelsea fans found that out the hard way when Liverpool edged them out twice in champions league semi-finals, as well as in the recent league cup final. When I went into grads. and then into JC Central I thought it would be so difficult to get close to my caregroup members. Xuan always talked about family, and for a very long time, I wondered how much the group was going to open up for me. And then, while they always have, gradually, I opened up myself too. And now, its such a good group to be in and there has really been the element of family. Hopefully, that would extend to the unit soon. Anyway my point was, it will be a long process, trying to curb my emotions while watching football, but hopefully not too long.
Pray for me! =)

Anyway, have deciding that in view of being underweight and stuff, perhaps fasting from food is not such a good idea. During QT I got a message that football is the area that I will have to gradually give up to make more time for meetings and stuff. And so I got it down to 2 options - uninstall FIFA 08 and missing the first 30 mins of every match. It pained me to give up either, and so it just went down to a coin toss. And guess what, bye bye FIFA 08. Until Winning Eleven Eleven on PS3 after A levels! So, bye bye to the long love affair between me and FIFA, I suppose. Haha.

To finish off, on Saturday, Arsenal drop points in the race. But what marred the whole match was a horrible injury to Eduardo. I have the video of replays of it, and believe me it is just so, so graphic and painful to watch. The lower studs clamped the boot to the ground, while the upper studs of the tackler's boots caused 90kg worth of impact onto Eduardo's ankle, causing it to shift outwards while the rest of the foot remained in the boot. The thought of it just makes me sick to the stomach. Thankfully, through very quick thinking from the physio, the relocation was done quickly enough and he would recover in 9 months.

That infamous tackler is none other than Martin Taylor. And there is certainly a lot that can be learnt from this injury. Firstly, many people, coincidentally all Birmingham players, say that he shouldn't even have got a yellow card as he "had no intent". Yes, it is certainly true that, if there is intent to cause harm but no harm was actually done, then it warrants a red card. So does it mean that if there is no intent to cause harm, there should be no red cards? The issue of 'intent' here is important. Clearly, Taylor did not intend to break Eduardo's leg. What he did intend to do though, was to get stuck into him, to "let him know Birmingham is in this game", which is a euphemism for saying we should show that through reckless tackles and rough play, we can make up the difference for the lack in our quality of passing, of shooting. Does this warrant a red card? Think about it. This is generally true for teams when they are not playing Arsenal. Tackles are with the intent of getting the ball. If you miss the ball, you get the player - its a foul. When is it a red card? If you are last man, if the tackle was late, or if the tackle was a bad one. You continually see players using their hands to show the shape of the ball, telling refs. that they were 'playing the ball'. Well, you could be Henry, who in the process of missing a tackle, just got a bit of the player, and so, foul, nothing more. You could be Crouch, who in the process of missing a tackle, missed the player as well, way too slow. You could be Rooney, and you went in hard with a tackle, didn't get the ball, and hurt the player. Surely, if the contact is bad, it's your fault. Yes, you could say you intended to get the ball, but if you make a mistake, you pay for it. Imagine if you wanted to hurt a person by contaminating his food with tabasco, and you do not realise that he cannot handle tabasco. He cannot handle it at all, that, if he drinks it, he will die. And so, you did not intend to kill him, but you intended to hurt him, and in the end he dies. Is that murder? Hell yes. So why is it that on the football pitch, this is not the case?

The worse thing though, is that Taylor is only banned for 3 matches. While Eduardo has to deal with the prospect of not playing for 9 months. Taylor is not going to Euro 2008. He will never represent England at any level. In fact, he may not even be playing Premier League football again next season. Furthermore, if he ever leaves Birmingham, the only club that would want to buy him is Tottenham Hotspur, where people would give him praise for what he did. Eduardo on the other hand, is Crostia's best striker. He is the reason why England is not even in Euro 2008. And he will not be able to represent his country. I, as an Arsenal fan, would never forget him. But other fans, other critics, they probably might. He would be left in the limelight while Taylor, would have gotten famous overnight. Just a search on google on 'taylor' without his surname already shows the first hit as 'Eduardo tackle was an accident'. So was half the murders that have taken place in this world. So Taylor has gotten famous over a tackle, and his life as a normal footballer will forever be remembered for that. He could probably stop playing football and receive pension for the rest of his life from Tottenham fans. And soon, he will be playing football again for Birmingham. Will he dare tackle again? What if, he breaks someone's leg again. Accident again? He would probably never play again if that happened. That should be how we view him in the light of Eduardo's tackle, if the latter were the case. We all know by now he did not mean to break Eduardo's leg, but the reaction from Birmingham players, deciding to show their support for him, that he will 'get through the trauma', and accusing Arsene Wenger of being a sore loser (which he is, but still) just shows a lack of professionalism on their part. We as Arsenal fans, can argue all we like and make Taylor feel as guilty as he can, but he doesn't deserve that. His colleagues deserve that as a whole, just that all the suffering will be solely on him. He has his teammates to blame. The fact still remains that the first thing he did after the ref. sent him off was to insist his lack of intent, not worry for Eduardo, certainly not concern over whether Eduardo would play football again. Arsenal's reaction is by no means uncalled for. I could only imagine what would happen if Mourinho was still here and that Taylor's tackle was on his star man, Drogba.