It's only six weeks since the holidays, and two since camp, but boy oh boy has it been such a wonderful six weeks of growth for me.

If I could trace it back, there were two highlights - the JC district prayermeet, and camp (of course!).

During the prayermeet, I really felt God move in me as everyone prayed for the few of us to step up to be CLs. yeah. It was just so real, the way he pointed out that I would have to change so many aspects of my life. I went home, and for a couple of days after that, I really reflected on the prayermeet, and God really elaborated upon a lot of things. I drew up a list of things which I would need to improve on, which included ridding the predispositions I have of some people, better time management, and also outreaching more. It may sound like the typical stuff any average person could improve on, but the difference was that I had set many specific targets, and placed many light sticks to follow in order to tread the right path. And, most importantly, I was a lot more determined to do it, not because being a CL requires a lot more responsibility than just a seed member (which it does of course), but because God really spoke into me and placed a burden for many many of my weaknesses, with the need to improve them, as well as for other things of this world, people, events. what have you. It was building, I think. There was unit meeting about developing a vision and conviction, and I really wanted one, but it just didn't come to me explicitly in the few days after. But then, many things just came together in the few days after that district prayermeet.

And then there was OASIS camp. It was the first camp where I was able to attend all 4 days of it. And it was only after that I had realised how much I had missed out during the 4 previous camps. The 3rd night was indeed the climax, but it was only because the previous nights had praise and worship, sermons, prayer time, and most importantly response time, to establish the platform for the 3rd night. And this was what I had missed out, and why my 3rd nights at other camps wasn't as impactful. The heart, soul, and mind need to be built up strong.

Camp was also a time where we got to know new people placed in our caregroups due to restructuring, and also, being a CL. In a way, the more I think about it, the more it is apparent that all these roles are really privileges, and not by default, or based on any merit or skills, but really by God's grace. And I suppose, having reached that conclusion, there is no need to worry about it any more. Throughout the camp I have grown lots, be it from the praise and worship, the workshops, or the teachings. And, of course, the games as well. If it's something not apparent enough already in this world, it's the increasing enthusiasm and potential that the youth hold for the future, something displayed very clearly during the war games. Hats off to games comm. for their planning and improvising to enhance the experience of camp. Also, the games were the perfect example of 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 which was touched on 3rd night,about the importance of having a winning mentality.

Another thing I learnt was about the camp culture of staying up late, and having good heart-to-heart conversations with our fellow members of Hope. Okay, maybe night 1's fellowship by watching Netherlands beat Italy wasn't exactly appropriate, but the rest of the night time was really fellowship to the max as the schedule wrote. So, yeah, this is another aspect of camp I had never experienced before. And I find the time really flies in the night and before you know it it's almost 5. Inevitably, this meant sleepy moments but amazingly I was focused during the night teachings and response, and when we gathered as a caregroup, and then in our schools for sharing.

Finally, this camp has impacted many lives. I see very clearly how some people in the group have really changed. During camp, people are so open, so honest, and so willing to improve. But I have to be selfish here, I want to be able to proudly declare that I have grown more than them. Not for the sake of comparing, but because I think I warrant it. And such a declaration can only be possible if I'm not a hypocrite, if my actions live up to my promises.

So all in all, the next 58 days of this restructuring is going to be tough all the way. The days are evil, so evil, they are numbered. But through the camp-revitalized ca2, I see a group of people who are all on fire for cg08 already, with little problems of committment and priorities. It's just like 07-08's Man United, a team of not just 11 top players, but a bench full of quality and able to do just as well. And the thing about that team was, the captain's role was no doubt important, but not the main reason why they were successful. That accolade goes to the mutual competition that the squad had which drove everyone to keep doing better. This coming from an Arsenal pureblood.

The skills of group members will improve, but that comes naturally if everyone understands why they need to have those skills.

So, while I haven't had the best preparation for the just-finished CT2, and so my results would probably not match those of previous tests, that is not the concern because I've put in effort for the gold medal that lasts eternally and will not tarnish one bit. And I am sure because of this, the upturn will come as these achievements will become stepping stones for the vision that we have.

I was absolutely delighted when Arsenal completed a season unbeaten in 03-04, as when Federer beat Nadal in last year's Wimbledon. Even more delighted was I when I got back prelim results and O level results. But come the end of 58 days later, I think the delight I experience will top all that. Not because Arsenal would be top of the league, Federer won wimbledon again and I would be fully prepared to ace prelims (which hey, are already very likely...=the first two at least, haha), but because these 58 days are going exciting days of outreaching, outreaching, outreaching, discipleship, leading, and learning. And stepping way out of my comfort zone than I could ever fathom.